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Sutton's Spinster by Scarlett Scott. A woman in a giant blue dress is plopped down with a man lounging behind her, kissing her neck. Her blush is...noticeable.

Elyse: The artist was sick the day the learned to draw the lower body.

Sneezy: Never skip leg day.

Amanda: Her dress reminds me of those Barbie dress cakes.

Sarah: That is just So Much Dress.

Also, are his trousers open in the front?! My word!

The Alien Farmer Needs a Wife by Ava Blaire. A shirtless man stares at us while an intense lightning storm happens in the background. He is very orange and shiny, like his whole body is dusted in makeup highlighter. He also looks like actor Christopher Meloni.,

From Syntha: I don’t even know where to start with this one.

Sarah: He looks like someone. Who does he look like. It’s going to bug me until I figure it out.

Elyse: It’s orange Detective Stabler.

Sarah: YES I THINK YOU ARE RIGHT.

Elyse: Doink Doink!

Beware the Neckromancer by Lilo Quie. A figure in a suit in front of a highly saturated rainbow watercolor background. Instead of a head, it's just a long giraffe neck that disappears off the cover.

Sarah: Syntha also sent this and I have to say, I respect the attempt:

Syntha: The giraffe neck just looks so silly rising out of the jacket.

Amanda: Honestly, this one is perfect.

No notes.

Elyse: His center of gravity is just so fucked up.

Can you imagine the orthopedic issues that guy has?

Sarah: I really can’t fault any of it.

Aleron by Macy Blake. A shirtless man with floppy dark hair and scruff is smiling at us. He's holding a silver necklace in his teeth. The background is a full moon in a red sky.

Sarah: This was a suggestion while I was looking at the Neckromancer (I see what was done there) and in icon size it looks like he is drooling.

Amanda: You can just tell this man has an overinflated ego.

Sarah: He is his own Chosen Champion, huh? Yeah, I see it.

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