📚 Something of a miracle

In an era of remakes, reboots, and redos, I was genuinely jazzed as hell to be getting a Practical Magic sequel this year. I’m such an evangelist for the original book and bad-good movie that I flew across the country to watch it with a buddy. After securing a giant beverage and a lifetime supply of popcorn—refreshments that came with the ridiculous commemorative plastic blender I gleefully purchased—I sat down and prepared to be razzled and dazzled anew. Both the razzle and the dazzle were in low supply. 🪄The magic was, well, impractical. The original film’s CGI is minimal (and mostly used on Jimmy Angelov’s creep ass), but PM2 went hard in the other direction. I wanted more potions and whimsy, less laser battles and silly flower magic. 🫠 How you gon’ make Lee Pace cringe? Not even that gorgeous redwood of a man could save that line about molecules. Whoever’s responsible, we have beef now. 💉Holy Botox, batman! Let women age! I know the pressure is real and women can’t win, and I’m not even anti-‘tox. But there was something so jarring about all those frozen faces that don’t match their kneecaps, and in a movie about witches. 🏳️‍🌈 Arya Stark deserved better. Antonia is reduced to k...