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When You Stop Fighting by Daryl Dittmer

Dittmer is a wonderful storyteller, and he knows just how to encourage and motivate you to spur you on.

Author Daryl Dittmer has written two really great books! In his first, When I Stop Fighting: The Unexpected Joy of Getting My Head Out of My Ass (see BookTrib’s review here), Dittmer acknowledges that he is not a celebrity, doctor, retired billionaire, politician or Navy SEAL, but, rather, “a very regular guy who desires to give back what I’ve been given.”

As a masterful storyteller, Dittmer tells the honest and authentic story about his journey of being given a second chance, at a young age, to straighten out a life that was littered with alcohol, drugs, lying, cheating and stealing. When I Stop Fighting is Daryl’s story — how he got to that better place and the hard lessons he learned along the way. 

Now with Book 2, When You Stop Fighting: The Road You’re on is Your Own Asphalt, Dittmer turns the tables — on to you. With both books, Dittmer’s goal is simple: to help people navigate the journey of life and make it easier, more rewarding and less complicated, and to help people understand they have a responsibility to be useful members of society.

Concrete Steps to Transform Your Future

As Dittmer says in the intro: “The journey of change can be difficult, intimidating and filled with myriad emotions. It can also be the momentous adventure of a lifetime complete with fulfillment, wonderful relationships, and incredible discoveries.” Who doesn’t want to start this journey??

You don’t need to have read the first book in order to read the second. Daryl relates his story in this book as well, but the focus is on you and your journey of growth to a better and happier future. 

In Dittmer’s own words, this book is “a much deeper dive into the journey of life and how it can be difficult and devastating or breathtaking and gratifying. How difficulty and uncertainty can be transformed into a life that you hadn’t before dreamed possible. It will also show you that the decision is entirely yours.”

When You Stop Fighting is filled with an enormous amount of useful information. It includes concrete steps you can take in your life to make changes and transform your future. It is truly uplifting and inspirational, and thoroughly engaging. Dittmer is a wonderful storyteller, and he knows just how to encourage and motivate you to spur you on. It feels like he is in your corner — because he is!

Endless Nuggets of Wisdom

Dittmer says that everyone’s life has the potential to go in a number of different directions, but we start wherever we are. He talks about how our past, our beginnings, don’t dictate where we end up, but they do play a part in getting us started and help point us in a certain direction.

If you’re going to grow at all, you need to leave no room for blame, says Dittmer. “So, let’s peek [at the past] but not get stuck there. We look to understand, we look in order to ask ourselves questions about how we’re going to improve and get better, not blame … blame takes all the responsibility off us and puts it on someone or something else, which leaves no room for our responsibility to improve ourselves.”

There were so many important nuggets I took from this book:

“We can never, ever achieve a contented, thoughtful, and genuinely free life when our goal is the approval of others.”

“There will always be difficult times and situations … if we shrink from these tough times or otherwise attempt to numb ourselves to feeling all that life will throw at us, we invite a featureless, anesthetized existence that offers no reward.”

“The only way to have a different life is to do things differently.”

Feeding Your Body, Mind and Soul

And a few pearls of wisdom Dittmer has collected that really spoke to me:

“This too shall pass.” (one of my mom’s favorites!)

“You can’t change other people, no matter how bad you think they need it. All we can change is ourselves.”

“Don’t give up before the miracle.”

As Dittmer says, there is no destination on this journey… no time when you can stop working on yourself or stop being willing to make changes and improve your life. He is still on his own journey every day. It’s about intentional conscious living and feeding your body, mind, heart and soul. It’s important to be open and embrace the changes in your life as they come. And, according to Dittmer, “it’s from this place that your life will unfold, bloom, and flower.” That’s beautiful.


After a humble and often tumultuous beginning to his life, Daryl Dittmer has worked relentlessly on himself for almost 40 years. Having had ownership in several business ventures and having been a carpenter, sales professional, builder, landlord, real estate investor, and consultant, Daryl has been as retired as he’s wanted to be since the age of 48. Now he is focused on writing and telling his story, in order to give back. With their sons grown and moved on, Daryl lives with his wife, Kristina, in the mountains of beautiful and peaceful North Georgia. They spend their time hiking, hanging out with their labs, and appreciating the mountain views and each other’s company.

When You Stop Fighting by Daryl Dittmer

Publish Date: 9/1/2024

Genre: Better Self, Nonfiction, Self Help

Author: Daryl Dittmer

Page Count: 221 pages

ISBN: 9798990659117

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