Posted by CBethM on September 20, 2024 in Author Posts |
A Seance in 1887I am a natural born skeptic. So, I wasn’t scared when I met my first psychic medium at a birthday party in 2005. I dismissed her insistence that an older man’s spirit wanted to talk with me. “His name began with ‘S’,” she said concentrating, “it sounds like ‘Sam’ but that’s not it exactly.” My beloved grandfather had been dead for ten years. His name was Stan.
Goosebumps. But just a good guess?
She went on. This spirit seemed to have a condition or something unusual about his face and hands. Goosebumps and shivers. Grandpa Stan had vitiligo, which causes the skin to lose pigment, mostly on his face and hands. Was my dead grandfather in this room? Though much of the spirit advice in that ten-minute session proved rather generic (e.g.: don’t worry; rely on your friends; use your talents), I left shaken; but strangely comforted.
Maybe subconsciously I followed some of that spirit advice, because five years later I had a new career as a picture book author. Eventually I was on my way toward twenty published books; happy in my work, researching new nonfiction topics for young readers—until I ran across the Fox sisters.
The Fox Sisters, Maggie, Kate, and Leah in 1852Maggie and Kate Fox were America’s first celebrity mediums. Starting in 1848, with older sister Leah as manager, the Fox sisters grew wildly popular by helping people talk to the dead. I was obsessed with the unbelievable story of these celebrity sisters and the history of American séances. Soon, I was telling the Fox sisters’ story to anyone who would listen; because I knew I couldn’t write about it. The story was too complex (media disinformation, the cost of fame, political division, women’s rights) and many of its events (murder, disease, death, war) super problematic for a picture book. Yet the idea of writing anything other than a picture book was so frightening, that it felt impossible.
Writing for middle grade and young adult readers made me nervous. Chapters, historical context, and a cast of characters seemed way above my skill level. I was too scared of failing to even try. My ever-growing Fox sisters research sat on multiple shelves and boxes in my office; haunting me as I finished the next picture book, and then another.
Whether you believe in the spirits or not, it is good advice to rely on friends. In a Zoom group with other writers, I mentioned the Fox story, and that maybe I’d get to it one day (translation: too scared). One of my nonfiction heroes, Barb Kerley, saw through me. She told me to start by writing a book proposal. I balked. Barb laughed, “I dare you! I dare you to write this book proposal.” The last time I took a dare was probably at some spooky sixth grade sleepover; but I blurted, “Fine, you’re on.”
Barb & her Grandpa, 1970I knew the topic well, so I wrote a proposal and a few sample chapters in weeks. I titled it American Spirits; my agent sold it to my requested editor within days. Was I thrilled? NO! I was terrified! I now had to produce a book for older readers called American Spirits!I was sure I couldn’t; I was freaking out.I heard Grandpa in my head, honey, you can run or you can work. I’m not much of a runner, I started to work.
But it was why-the-heck-am-I-doing-this-to-myself kind of work. Every day that I sat down to draft American Spirits, I was scared—groping in the dark, doubting, and uncomfortable. In a way I had been right—I didn’t know how to handle a lot of characters and wasn’t used to weaving in rich context. I slogged through a first draft and sent it to the editor, who explained that the Fox Sisters idea remained great, but my attempt at telling their story? Not so much.
Her honest feedback helped fuel my determination. Like a heroine in a horror movie, I got a little less scared, and way more angry. I’d show her a good story! One with levitations, talking ghosts, flying guitars, celebrity gossip, romance, Ben Franklin, Frederick Douglass, Mary Lincoln—plus mesmerism, cholera, Quakers, Arctic exploration, and the Civil War. I created a rangy, spooky, shape-shifting monster of a story. Only intensive revisions could hope to control it. It took eighteen months; I wrote scared every single day. I kind of loved it.
About a year in, I realized that the monster seemed tamer and with editorial help, had a recognizable shape. A few months later, the story came to life; and I believed in my ability to share it with older readers. Now I’m thrilled to say that American Spirits: the Famous Fox sisters and the Mysterious Fad that Haunted a Nation will be published next year, the same month my grandfather was born 115 years ago.
Conquering this scary project means that I will never see a third, fifth or tenth grade writer who says, “I can’t,” the same way again. I can’t isn’t defiant or lazy. I can’t means I’m scared. It’s wrapped in, I’m not good enough, you’ll think I’m stupid, and what if I fail AFTER I’ve tried so hard? Writing is scary and those talking ghosts in our heads are real; never discount their power. We fight them when we share our hearts and minds, ask for mortal (or even spiritual) help, and bravely take on the necessary risks to keep creating.
Here’s to being scared! It’s the only way to grow.
Barb Rosenstock is the author of more than twenty nonfiction and historical fiction picture books including the Caldecott Honor title, The Noisy Paint Box, illustrated by Mary Grandpré. Other awards include an Orbis Pictus Honor, a Sydney Taylor Honor, The South Asia Book Award, and SCBWI’s Golden Kite for Nonfiction. Her latest picture books include The Great Lakes, illustrated by Jamey Christoph, and Sea Without a Shore, illustrated by Katherine Roy. American Spirits, her first nonfiction book for young adults, will be published in April of 2025. www.barbrosenstock.com
English (US) · 